When I visit with Granny, which I try to do often, we sometimes go up to Walmart to do some shopping. Granny just loves her Walmart! This is the hot spot she visits (religiously) once a week.
We have different reasons why we enjoy going to Walmart together. Granny likes when I take her because she'd rather not drive. I like when I take her because I enjoy buying her groceries.
My little Granny is full aware that when she's with me, she's not allowed to pay for anything. Sometime's, I admit, I'll let her buy me a "hambooger" (as she calls it, remember she's Spanish!) because I know it makes her feel good to bless me. This story sums up our grocery shopping experience.
When we arrive, Granny grabs the cart. She likes to push it and I like to fill it up. Granny always has her grocery list in hand. She knows exactly what she needs for the week. She checks prices on everything with great precision. My Granny is on a tight budget, like most women her age, and she's from the "old school" when you could buy 12 cans of green beans for a nickle! My grandmother ALWAYS buys generic. Always. She buys Sam's Soda, generic mac and cheese (it's like paste!) generic canned vegetables (yikes!), generic cheese (yuk), and the worst of all, generic ice cream (imitation!).
Well, not happening on my watch! Now, you may be someone who enjoys generic brands and one of those people who swears "you can't tell the difference!" Sorry, but I don't buy it. Not the food, nor that statement. I can always tell the difference.
Granny and I are somewhat entertaining when we shop together. It's actually pretty comical. I'll put something (name brand) in the cart and Granny will take it out and replace it with the cheap stuff (yikes!), only for me to take it out again. One of the items on her list was green beans so I grabbed a can. Granny said, "No, Bikki, dat's too much! Put it back, we get dis one." Of course, it was generic. Sam's green beans. Look, I don't know Sam. I don't know where he's been or where he grows his green beans, so I sure don't want my grandmother eating them.
I said, "Granny, I"m not buying the cheap stuff. You're with me, I'm paying and we're getting these." She knew it was a waste of her time to argue with me (God bless her for trying though!). She pouted a little bit. She even gave me that "look", but, eventually, sitting comfortably in the cart were two cans of Del Monte Green Beans.
This process is repeated over and over again. We were almost done when Granny looked at me and said, "We need to go dis way", Bikki." I followed her to the frozen section. Ice cream. I knew what was coming. Oh, boy, this was going to be fun. She thinks she's so sneaky and clever. She tries to keep me engrossed in conversation, while she slips the generic ice milk (gross!) in the cart. You'd think she'd have learned by now. Doesn't she know who she's dealing with?! I stood there and let her put it in. I smiled at her, she smiled back. Oh, she thought she was home free. I wanted to wait a few seconds. I decided to allow her to taste victory. I knew it would be short lived!
Then, I walked over, didn't say a word, picked it up out of the cart, placed it back in the refrigerator and grabbed a carton of Breyer's Vanilla Bean. I played the same game. I smiled at her as I carried on a conversation about the weather or something, trying to distract her. Too late. She saw me. She yelled, "NO, BIKKI! That's ree-dick-u-lous! Dat's too much! I say NO! Put that back!"
Oh, here we go again.
p.s. I like the word yikes now.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
"May I step in?"
The other day, I got a call from a woman saying, "Hi Victoria! I'm calling about your friend Amy. She's trying to win a prize and if you'll let me come over and demonstrate the Rainbow vacuum cleaner, you're going to help her be one step closer!" Ah, the dreaded sales pitch call.
Don't you just hate these calls? It puts you in the most awkward of situations. Ok, so I have two choices at this point.
#1. Tell her I've never heard of Amy. Or #2. Lie and say I don't like Amy.
Ten minutes later, the appointment was set. Have you ever said yes to something and then regretted it? No? Ok, maybe it's just me then. Liars! (LOL)
Our appointment day came and I was so tempted to cancel. I'm an extremely busy person (refer to blog "this one's for you!" if you don't believe me!) and the last thing I felt like doing was having a stranger in my house. I knew the deal. She would come into my "clean" house and use her Rainbow to vacuum my carpet to prove what a lousy housekeeper I REALLY am. I wasn't in the mood for this! I knew I would not only have to endure an hour and a half demonstration, but I would need to shake my head yes to her questions and try my best to look interested in this overpriced system (I actually do think they're worth every dime!). Did you know that the Rainbow can kill those disgusting dust mites that sleep in our mattresses? I figure let them be. They keep me company!
Anyway, the reality is that I am friends with Amy. I actually like her very much. And if I could help my friend out, what's a little bit of my time? When she arrived, I noticed from the window that she had brought her two children along. She carried in two unopened boxes that contained the Rainbow (I bet that she wasn't planning on carrying them back out!), set up for her demonstration, and proceeded to ask me for friend's names so that I could win my prize (be expecting your call any day now!). She turned out to be a sweet, pleasant lady and her children enjoyed watching Sponge Bob from my living room. This whole experience brought back a memory from my own childhood that I wanted to share with each of you.
When I was 7 years old, my father was a salesman for Electrolux vacuum cleaners. He was very good at it. Dad never met a stranger (hmm, I wonder who I got that from!). I was very proud of him and all the trophies he brought home from being top salesman of the month again and again! That's MY Dad!
I'll never forget the first time my father asked if I wanted to go with him on a Saturday morning to "work". I was thrilled. Are you kidding me? Any day that I could spend with my Daddy was a good day. I enthusiastically said yes!
When that Saturday morning arrived, Dad came into my bedroom at 6:00am to wake me up. He whispered in my ear, "Do you still want to go?" I immediately jumped out of bed! I had even slept in my clothes! I was ready! I was actually going to watch my Daddy work. I felt like the luckiest 7 year old in the world!
Now, these were the days of door-to-door sales calls. Here's how it works. You scope out a neighborhood and start a knockin'. And that's just what we did.
Before we walked up to the first front door, my father sat with me to give me my "sales training". He said, "Baby Girl, here's what you're gonna do. Every door we knock on today, I want you to look up, smile and bat those beautiful brown eyes of yours. And this is the most important part of all, LOOK HUNGRY!" Hey, I could do that. I WAS hungry. Dad forgot to feed me breakfast before we had headed out. (Hmm, I wonder, could he have done that on purpose?)
Dad then placed this huge, gold bible (yes, a bible!) under his arm, held onto the cute little black haired girl's hand (that was me!) and we started up the walkway to our first door. After my father gave his pitch to the lady of the house, (as he called her), convincing her that he had the answer to all of her problems, he would then ask, "May I step in?" I can't remember anyone turning him down.
So, now it was time to do my part. I was ready and did as I was told. I've always been a great student. I knew what to do. I smiled on cue, looked up and the easiest part....looked hungry. Dad promised that when we sold our first unit, he would take me straight to the store to buy me a Grape Soda and a pack of HoHos.......for breakfast!
It wasn't long into the morning before we made our first sale and headed to the 7Eleven. We ended up selling 4 vacuum cleaners that day! I drank and ate so much, I had a stomach ache, but I was proud of how I'd helped my Daddy "close the deal". I'll never forget those memories.
My father passed away 3 years ago this April. I miss him a lot. The pain is unbearable at times. Dad and I used to sit and talk for hours about that Saturday morning. We laughed so hard. It always made him smile. Thanks, Dad, for waking me up that day. I sure do miss you.
I imagine that when my Dad stepped into Heaven, batted his adorable, beady little eyes, smiled at the gatekeeper and asked,
"May I step in?" And I believe that's exactly what he did.
Don't you just hate these calls? It puts you in the most awkward of situations. Ok, so I have two choices at this point.
#1. Tell her I've never heard of Amy. Or #2. Lie and say I don't like Amy.
Ten minutes later, the appointment was set. Have you ever said yes to something and then regretted it? No? Ok, maybe it's just me then. Liars! (LOL)
Our appointment day came and I was so tempted to cancel. I'm an extremely busy person (refer to blog "this one's for you!" if you don't believe me!) and the last thing I felt like doing was having a stranger in my house. I knew the deal. She would come into my "clean" house and use her Rainbow to vacuum my carpet to prove what a lousy housekeeper I REALLY am. I wasn't in the mood for this! I knew I would not only have to endure an hour and a half demonstration, but I would need to shake my head yes to her questions and try my best to look interested in this overpriced system (I actually do think they're worth every dime!). Did you know that the Rainbow can kill those disgusting dust mites that sleep in our mattresses? I figure let them be. They keep me company!
Anyway, the reality is that I am friends with Amy. I actually like her very much. And if I could help my friend out, what's a little bit of my time? When she arrived, I noticed from the window that she had brought her two children along. She carried in two unopened boxes that contained the Rainbow (I bet that she wasn't planning on carrying them back out!), set up for her demonstration, and proceeded to ask me for friend's names so that I could win my prize (be expecting your call any day now!). She turned out to be a sweet, pleasant lady and her children enjoyed watching Sponge Bob from my living room. This whole experience brought back a memory from my own childhood that I wanted to share with each of you.
When I was 7 years old, my father was a salesman for Electrolux vacuum cleaners. He was very good at it. Dad never met a stranger (hmm, I wonder who I got that from!). I was very proud of him and all the trophies he brought home from being top salesman of the month again and again! That's MY Dad!
I'll never forget the first time my father asked if I wanted to go with him on a Saturday morning to "work". I was thrilled. Are you kidding me? Any day that I could spend with my Daddy was a good day. I enthusiastically said yes!
When that Saturday morning arrived, Dad came into my bedroom at 6:00am to wake me up. He whispered in my ear, "Do you still want to go?" I immediately jumped out of bed! I had even slept in my clothes! I was ready! I was actually going to watch my Daddy work. I felt like the luckiest 7 year old in the world!
Now, these were the days of door-to-door sales calls. Here's how it works. You scope out a neighborhood and start a knockin'. And that's just what we did.
Before we walked up to the first front door, my father sat with me to give me my "sales training". He said, "Baby Girl, here's what you're gonna do. Every door we knock on today, I want you to look up, smile and bat those beautiful brown eyes of yours. And this is the most important part of all, LOOK HUNGRY!" Hey, I could do that. I WAS hungry. Dad forgot to feed me breakfast before we had headed out. (Hmm, I wonder, could he have done that on purpose?)
Dad then placed this huge, gold bible (yes, a bible!) under his arm, held onto the cute little black haired girl's hand (that was me!) and we started up the walkway to our first door. After my father gave his pitch to the lady of the house, (as he called her), convincing her that he had the answer to all of her problems, he would then ask, "May I step in?" I can't remember anyone turning him down.
So, now it was time to do my part. I was ready and did as I was told. I've always been a great student. I knew what to do. I smiled on cue, looked up and the easiest part....looked hungry. Dad promised that when we sold our first unit, he would take me straight to the store to buy me a Grape Soda and a pack of HoHos.......for breakfast!
It wasn't long into the morning before we made our first sale and headed to the 7Eleven. We ended up selling 4 vacuum cleaners that day! I drank and ate so much, I had a stomach ache, but I was proud of how I'd helped my Daddy "close the deal". I'll never forget those memories.
My father passed away 3 years ago this April. I miss him a lot. The pain is unbearable at times. Dad and I used to sit and talk for hours about that Saturday morning. We laughed so hard. It always made him smile. Thanks, Dad, for waking me up that day. I sure do miss you.
I imagine that when my Dad stepped into Heaven, batted his adorable, beady little eyes, smiled at the gatekeeper and asked,
"May I step in?" And I believe that's exactly what he did.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
This One's For YOU!!! (especially you, JW!)
Alright, alright! I'm writing! Jeez! Ok, so should I complain or jump up and down at the fact that I receive e-mails from some of you asking, "When are you putting up another blog?!" Hello, but isn't one every few days enough for you people!?!! I guess not.
So, this blog is about blogging. Actually, all kidding aside, I'm humbled that you enjoy reading my blogs. I will do my best to try to keep them coming as much as possible. I mean, I would NEVER want to be accused of bringing any type of stress to any of your lives by depriving you in any way! Just wondering, have you been to the library or a book store lately? There are some great books out there! LOL (for any of you born before 1970, that means "laugh out loud"!)
So, here's the deal. Just for you, my dedicated readers, I will blog blog blog as soon as I get the girls up for school in the morning, make pancakes for Kolby (everyday, yes EVERYDAY!), help her find socks, shoes and gym clothes, keep Kendra from hurting said Kolby Girl, take Gabby out for potty, feed and water Gabby, play ball with Gabby for 5 minutes before leaving her for 7 hours a day (guilt!), get myself ready for the office and another day, scrape the ice off of my car (I've got to get a garage door opener!), pray with children, drive them to school, kiss them good-bye, open up the doors to the center, check my calendar for appointments of the day, answer questions about abortion, adoption, unstop the office toilet (actually my incredible assistant, Sara, does this for me!) take phone calls, race to speaking engagements, beg for money for the center (I swear, my job title should be "professional beggar"!), take teryn and tawni's phonecalls in between (at least 17 of those a day!), let's not forget my sister, brother and mom's phonecalls, make deposits at bank, go to rotary club, convince teenagers not to have sex, attend Chamber events, banquets and let's not forget the client who wants me to be her "birthing coach", pick girls up from school, bring them home, argue over whose turn it is to choose what's for dinner, keep Kendra from hurting said Kolby Girl (again!), take Gabby out (again!), water, feed and play with said dog, get homework done, prepare Chicken Victoria, get through dinner without arguments, clear off table, clean kitchen, hang out with girls, play Phase 10 or watch AI, get them ready for bed, pray with them, listen to events of the day and then finally, (breathe!) kiss them goodnight!
So, no worries. Instead of my sweet "me" time in the tub every night, with a glass of wine, candles and Nora Jones, I will make sure to jump right on and blog. Just for you!
I love you all and seriously, I wouldn't trade any of it!
And P.S - I know there are many more of you reading than commenting! So, now you do your part! Leave me a comment (but, only if they're nice!)
So, this blog is about blogging. Actually, all kidding aside, I'm humbled that you enjoy reading my blogs. I will do my best to try to keep them coming as much as possible. I mean, I would NEVER want to be accused of bringing any type of stress to any of your lives by depriving you in any way! Just wondering, have you been to the library or a book store lately? There are some great books out there! LOL (for any of you born before 1970, that means "laugh out loud"!)
So, here's the deal. Just for you, my dedicated readers, I will blog blog blog as soon as I get the girls up for school in the morning, make pancakes for Kolby (everyday, yes EVERYDAY!), help her find socks, shoes and gym clothes, keep Kendra from hurting said Kolby Girl, take Gabby out for potty, feed and water Gabby, play ball with Gabby for 5 minutes before leaving her for 7 hours a day (guilt!), get myself ready for the office and another day, scrape the ice off of my car (I've got to get a garage door opener!), pray with children, drive them to school, kiss them good-bye, open up the doors to the center, check my calendar for appointments of the day, answer questions about abortion, adoption, unstop the office toilet (actually my incredible assistant, Sara, does this for me!) take phone calls, race to speaking engagements, beg for money for the center (I swear, my job title should be "professional beggar"!), take teryn and tawni's phonecalls in between (at least 17 of those a day!), let's not forget my sister, brother and mom's phonecalls, make deposits at bank, go to rotary club, convince teenagers not to have sex, attend Chamber events, banquets and let's not forget the client who wants me to be her "birthing coach", pick girls up from school, bring them home, argue over whose turn it is to choose what's for dinner, keep Kendra from hurting said Kolby Girl (again!), take Gabby out (again!), water, feed and play with said dog, get homework done, prepare Chicken Victoria, get through dinner without arguments, clear off table, clean kitchen, hang out with girls, play Phase 10 or watch AI, get them ready for bed, pray with them, listen to events of the day and then finally, (breathe!) kiss them goodnight!
So, no worries. Instead of my sweet "me" time in the tub every night, with a glass of wine, candles and Nora Jones, I will make sure to jump right on and blog. Just for you!
I love you all and seriously, I wouldn't trade any of it!
And P.S - I know there are many more of you reading than commenting! So, now you do your part! Leave me a comment (but, only if they're nice!)
Saturday, February 16, 2008
2008 Is Going to Be Great!
2007 was a year of great challenges and even bigger changes. Some good, others not so good. I accepted a position as Executive Director at a Crisis Center, I re-established old friendships from years past, made new ones, my divorce was final, child support battles grew ugly, some long term relationships ended and I had to deal with some nasty so called self-appointed, self-righteous "Godly Christians" who tried to destroy me.
But, here I am. Still standing! In spite of all the hardships and challenges I've faced, I continued to press forward. But, it wasn't without lots of help. From God Himself and the people He placed in my life for such a time as this.
These are the times when you have to learn what it means to have faith. Thank God that even the "faith of a mustard seed" can suffice because that's about all I had in 2007.
I say it often, but I have been blessed with an incredible family and group of friends. Last year proved to be a time when I needed them more than ever.
I'm so thankful that the people in my life love me just because. Despite my shortcomings, faults, mistakes or anything I've ever done, they've stuck by and supported me. Without you guys, I don't know where I'd be today. You know who you are.
I wanted to say thanks. For showing me what true, unconditional love is all about. You guys picked me up when I wanted to stay down. Held me up when I felt like I couldn't go another day. You encouraged me when I saw no hope. And you believed in me when others didn't. Each one of you literally showed me what a real Christian looks like and not an imposter posing as one. Many people should learn from you.
I love you all. I know that this simple little blog can't do justice for what you've meant to me, but even so, you'll love me anyway!
But, here I am. Still standing! In spite of all the hardships and challenges I've faced, I continued to press forward. But, it wasn't without lots of help. From God Himself and the people He placed in my life for such a time as this.
These are the times when you have to learn what it means to have faith. Thank God that even the "faith of a mustard seed" can suffice because that's about all I had in 2007.
I say it often, but I have been blessed with an incredible family and group of friends. Last year proved to be a time when I needed them more than ever.
I'm so thankful that the people in my life love me just because. Despite my shortcomings, faults, mistakes or anything I've ever done, they've stuck by and supported me. Without you guys, I don't know where I'd be today. You know who you are.
I wanted to say thanks. For showing me what true, unconditional love is all about. You guys picked me up when I wanted to stay down. Held me up when I felt like I couldn't go another day. You encouraged me when I saw no hope. And you believed in me when others didn't. Each one of you literally showed me what a real Christian looks like and not an imposter posing as one. Many people should learn from you.
I love you all. I know that this simple little blog can't do justice for what you've meant to me, but even so, you'll love me anyway!
"Do I Rook 83?"
My 4'ft9" tall, 83 year old Granny still drives a car. Even I think this is insane. One day she called and asked me if I could help her get new car insurance. She had just received her annual statement and her rates had gone up considerably. She was ticked. She was complaining to me about how expensive it was and she was refusing to pay it. She literally said to me, "Bikki, why du I need to pay so much? I only drive to Walmart and back once a week. I not gonna pay it. It's ree-dick-u-las!" I said, "Granny, it doesn't matter how far you drive, you have to have insurance. It's the law!"
After convincing Granny that she wouldn't want to spend her silver years behind bars, she calmed down. Well, a little bit. I started making phone calls to insurance companies. The quotes were all $950+ and she was getting more and more agitated. She said, "Bikki, jew come back tomorrow and we drive to town to rook around." Granny has no concept that it's a 30 minute drive for me one way to her house, but nobody can say no to sweet Granny! So, I agreed to come back.
When I arrived the next morning, Granny was ready to go. She had her purse, hat and gloves on and we made the 15 minute trip into town. We met with an insurance agent who turned out to be a very patient and understanding man. Granny answered all of his questions. We sat and waited for the verdict! We couldn't believe it, the quote was $200 less than the 7 quotes we'd received a day earlier! I was so excited. She seemed happy about it too. Then she looked at the man and said, "Well, let me tink about it." I was stunned. "Granny, this is the best price we've gotten in two days, you need to just do it!" She said, "No, Bikki, I gonna tink about it. Goodbye and Tank you." So, we left.
When we got in the car, I said, "Granny, why?" She said, "I not gonna let him tink I gonna buy on dee spot. Bikki, you come back tomorrow and we gonna buy it." Now I was the one who was ticked.
I made the trip back home again only to return the next morning. We made our 2nd trip into town and walked through the insurance office. The nice man remembered us and was happy to see us. Granny told him she was ready to sign up. He said, "Great, come on back!"
He started up his computer to enter all of Granny's information. He began to ask her questions like the spelling of her name, address, etc. etc. Then he asked for her driver's license. She handed it to him. He looked at it and then looked up quite confused. I said, "Is something wrong?" He looked over at my Granny, "Esperanza, this driver's license says you were born in 1924. Is that right? " Granny said, "Jes." He continued. "That's not what you told me yesterday. Well, that's going to change your rate a bit. Let's see here. The rate is now $900.00." I thought Granny was going to come off her chair.
She looked at him, pointed her finger and said, "$900! How can be so much now? Jew told me jesterday it was $700!" He said, "Well, Esperanza, yesterday you were 73. How come you didn't say anything when I got your age wrong yesterday?"
And my precious little Granny looked at the nice man, batted her eyes and with a big smile on her face said,
"Well, du I rook 83?"
After convincing Granny that she wouldn't want to spend her silver years behind bars, she calmed down. Well, a little bit. I started making phone calls to insurance companies. The quotes were all $950+ and she was getting more and more agitated. She said, "Bikki, jew come back tomorrow and we drive to town to rook around." Granny has no concept that it's a 30 minute drive for me one way to her house, but nobody can say no to sweet Granny! So, I agreed to come back.
When I arrived the next morning, Granny was ready to go. She had her purse, hat and gloves on and we made the 15 minute trip into town. We met with an insurance agent who turned out to be a very patient and understanding man. Granny answered all of his questions. We sat and waited for the verdict! We couldn't believe it, the quote was $200 less than the 7 quotes we'd received a day earlier! I was so excited. She seemed happy about it too. Then she looked at the man and said, "Well, let me tink about it." I was stunned. "Granny, this is the best price we've gotten in two days, you need to just do it!" She said, "No, Bikki, I gonna tink about it. Goodbye and Tank you." So, we left.
When we got in the car, I said, "Granny, why?" She said, "I not gonna let him tink I gonna buy on dee spot. Bikki, you come back tomorrow and we gonna buy it." Now I was the one who was ticked.
I made the trip back home again only to return the next morning. We made our 2nd trip into town and walked through the insurance office. The nice man remembered us and was happy to see us. Granny told him she was ready to sign up. He said, "Great, come on back!"
He started up his computer to enter all of Granny's information. He began to ask her questions like the spelling of her name, address, etc. etc. Then he asked for her driver's license. She handed it to him. He looked at it and then looked up quite confused. I said, "Is something wrong?" He looked over at my Granny, "Esperanza, this driver's license says you were born in 1924. Is that right? " Granny said, "Jes." He continued. "That's not what you told me yesterday. Well, that's going to change your rate a bit. Let's see here. The rate is now $900.00." I thought Granny was going to come off her chair.
She looked at him, pointed her finger and said, "$900! How can be so much now? Jew told me jesterday it was $700!" He said, "Well, Esperanza, yesterday you were 73. How come you didn't say anything when I got your age wrong yesterday?"
And my precious little Granny looked at the nice man, batted her eyes and with a big smile on her face said,
"Well, du I rook 83?"
Friday, February 15, 2008
"Have you heard about?"
We've all done it. Started it. Listened in on it. Spread it or at the very least, participated in it. What I'm referring to is gossip.
What a nasty little word. And deadly. The damage it can cause can be devastating to someone's life. Yet, most people continue to do it. I am convinced that gossip hurts people more than the truth does. I'm a witness.
As you know, I've recently gone through a divorce. I've said in previous blogs that I've learned a lot about myself these past two years and it's true. But, I've also learned even more about other people. I'm not referring to their personal lives, but their character. I've also learned who my true friends are and can tell you that this was one of the hardest lessons of them all.
Have you ever gotten that phone call from a friend or colleague where they just HAVE to tell you something? You know what I mean. They just heard some news and they just had to share it with you. It goes something like this, "Hi. How are you? Good, good. Hey, did you hear about...? I just thought you'd like to know." Or I just love this one, "You know I'm a Christian so I'm not trying to gossip, but I wanted to tell you about what I just heard so you can PRAY about it." I call this one "gossipping in the name of Jesus" gossip. This one is the most disturbing of all. How about next time instead of getting on the "prayer" (gossip) chain and asking for "prayer", you get on your own knees and pray for them yourself! This is one of the reasons that I'm convinced people don't go to church anymore. They witness for themselves how "Christians" judge, treat others and gossip and they want no part of it. Come on, let's not play dumb. We all know what gossip looks, smells and tastes like.
Why is it that so many people get joy out of gossiping about someone's life or misfortune? I have no place for people like this in my life. As a matter of fact, I've lost friends because of it. For whatever reason, there are some who like to gossip about me. I've had to develop thick skin over the years. It hasn't been easy, but with God's help, I've been able to it. He's showed me that it doesn't matter what anyone says or thinks about me, it only matters what He thinks. I love that.
You'd think that people have better things to do than go around talking or worrying about someone else's life? I guess not. Did you know that in the bible, God places a gossiper in the same category as a murderer! Ouch. This would be called a clue as to what He thinks about it.
Yes, we all do it or have done it at one time or another in our lives. No matter how you look at it, it's wrong. So the next time you find yourself eager to hear about someone's life or what so and so says or so and so did, try reading a book, take up a hobby, play a sport, workout or get a job. Obviously, you've got way too much time on your hands.
Or you could just heed this great advice:
"SHUT UP!"
What a nasty little word. And deadly. The damage it can cause can be devastating to someone's life. Yet, most people continue to do it. I am convinced that gossip hurts people more than the truth does. I'm a witness.
As you know, I've recently gone through a divorce. I've said in previous blogs that I've learned a lot about myself these past two years and it's true. But, I've also learned even more about other people. I'm not referring to their personal lives, but their character. I've also learned who my true friends are and can tell you that this was one of the hardest lessons of them all.
Have you ever gotten that phone call from a friend or colleague where they just HAVE to tell you something? You know what I mean. They just heard some news and they just had to share it with you. It goes something like this, "Hi. How are you? Good, good. Hey, did you hear about...? I just thought you'd like to know." Or I just love this one, "You know I'm a Christian so I'm not trying to gossip, but I wanted to tell you about what I just heard so you can PRAY about it." I call this one "gossipping in the name of Jesus" gossip. This one is the most disturbing of all. How about next time instead of getting on the "prayer" (gossip) chain and asking for "prayer", you get on your own knees and pray for them yourself! This is one of the reasons that I'm convinced people don't go to church anymore. They witness for themselves how "Christians" judge, treat others and gossip and they want no part of it. Come on, let's not play dumb. We all know what gossip looks, smells and tastes like.
Why is it that so many people get joy out of gossiping about someone's life or misfortune? I have no place for people like this in my life. As a matter of fact, I've lost friends because of it. For whatever reason, there are some who like to gossip about me. I've had to develop thick skin over the years. It hasn't been easy, but with God's help, I've been able to it. He's showed me that it doesn't matter what anyone says or thinks about me, it only matters what He thinks. I love that.
You'd think that people have better things to do than go around talking or worrying about someone else's life? I guess not. Did you know that in the bible, God places a gossiper in the same category as a murderer! Ouch. This would be called a clue as to what He thinks about it.
Yes, we all do it or have done it at one time or another in our lives. No matter how you look at it, it's wrong. So the next time you find yourself eager to hear about someone's life or what so and so says or so and so did, try reading a book, take up a hobby, play a sport, workout or get a job. Obviously, you've got way too much time on your hands.
Or you could just heed this great advice:
"SHUT UP!"
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
I've fallen....on purpose!
If you have only been reading my blog and have failed to log onto the "blogs I read daily", you don't know what you're missing! Come on, get with the program. It's not like you have anything better to do than check out 7 blogs a day!! My sister's blog (a pilot's life for me), my daughter's blogs, they're all great!
Ok, so my sister's latest blog is about my nephew Nolan and the things he says. It's hilarious. All true too. And it got me thinking about something that one of my girl's said to me recently.
Since my daughter's were small, I have made a point to let them know how valuable I think they are, to me and to God. I was determined to instill in each of them confidence and high self esteem (not arrogance, but confidence, there's a difference!). One of the ways I did this was by letting them know that God had the very best in mind for their lives. I've always told them that the men that marry them are the four luckiest men on the planet. (just a bonus that they get me as a mother-in-law!)
As parent's, we sometimes make the mistake of believing that our children don't listen to what we say or do, but we're way wrong. At different times in my daughter's lives, there is something that I've always done and always will.
Picture this: One of them walks in the room, I fall on the floor in a faint like way and gasp as I'm looking up at them. They scream, "Mommy, what's the matter?" I say, gasping for air, "Of all the 10 year olds (or 4 year olds, or 18 or 22 year olds, depending on their age at the time) God gave me you and allowed me to be your mommy! I'm the luckiest woman in the world!" My girls (every one of them!) would look at me and say, a bit agitated, I might add, "Oh, Mommy, get up off the floor! Stop doing that! Why do you always have to do that!?"
Yea, it would hurt my feelings sometimes. But, I never let them know it. I didn't want to make them feel bad.
:)Sidenote: Teryn and Tawni are now married women. They've both told me that they loved it when I did that. I guess they just couldn't let me know it at the time. :)
A few months ago, I was having a bad day. A really bad day. I'm talking about one of those crying, don't want to get out of bed bad days, which I rarely have. Kolby, my youngest, was home with me. I tried to hide it, but she knew I was sad about something. I was lying on the couch when I heard Kolby screaming from upstairs, "Mommy, come here! Hurry, Mommy, I need you!"
As any good mother would do, I darted up the stairs to see what had happened to my beautiful, baby girl! Had she hurt herself? Did she burn herself with the curling iron....again? All I knew was I couldn't get to her fast enough.
When I reached her bedroom, Kolby was lying on the floor, gasping for air. I was in a panic! "Baby, what is it, are you alright? What happened?"
She looked up at me with those beautiful, huge brown eyes of hers and said, "Oh Mommy, out of all the Mommies in the world, God gave me you! I get to be your daughter! I am the luckiest girl in the world!"
And right at that moment, in a split second, I didn't even remember what I'd been crying about.
Ok, so my sister's latest blog is about my nephew Nolan and the things he says. It's hilarious. All true too. And it got me thinking about something that one of my girl's said to me recently.
Since my daughter's were small, I have made a point to let them know how valuable I think they are, to me and to God. I was determined to instill in each of them confidence and high self esteem (not arrogance, but confidence, there's a difference!). One of the ways I did this was by letting them know that God had the very best in mind for their lives. I've always told them that the men that marry them are the four luckiest men on the planet. (just a bonus that they get me as a mother-in-law!)
As parent's, we sometimes make the mistake of believing that our children don't listen to what we say or do, but we're way wrong. At different times in my daughter's lives, there is something that I've always done and always will.
Picture this: One of them walks in the room, I fall on the floor in a faint like way and gasp as I'm looking up at them. They scream, "Mommy, what's the matter?" I say, gasping for air, "Of all the 10 year olds (or 4 year olds, or 18 or 22 year olds, depending on their age at the time) God gave me you and allowed me to be your mommy! I'm the luckiest woman in the world!" My girls (every one of them!) would look at me and say, a bit agitated, I might add, "Oh, Mommy, get up off the floor! Stop doing that! Why do you always have to do that!?"
Yea, it would hurt my feelings sometimes. But, I never let them know it. I didn't want to make them feel bad.
:)Sidenote: Teryn and Tawni are now married women. They've both told me that they loved it when I did that. I guess they just couldn't let me know it at the time. :)
A few months ago, I was having a bad day. A really bad day. I'm talking about one of those crying, don't want to get out of bed bad days, which I rarely have. Kolby, my youngest, was home with me. I tried to hide it, but she knew I was sad about something. I was lying on the couch when I heard Kolby screaming from upstairs, "Mommy, come here! Hurry, Mommy, I need you!"
As any good mother would do, I darted up the stairs to see what had happened to my beautiful, baby girl! Had she hurt herself? Did she burn herself with the curling iron....again? All I knew was I couldn't get to her fast enough.
When I reached her bedroom, Kolby was lying on the floor, gasping for air. I was in a panic! "Baby, what is it, are you alright? What happened?"
She looked up at me with those beautiful, huge brown eyes of hers and said, "Oh Mommy, out of all the Mommies in the world, God gave me you! I get to be your daughter! I am the luckiest girl in the world!"
And right at that moment, in a split second, I didn't even remember what I'd been crying about.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Single Again
Two years. That's almost how long that I've been single now. Sometimes it's surreal. I never thought I'd be single again at 43, but here I am. Since it's better to be single than to wish you were, you'd think we'd want to be very selective when choosing a mate for life. You'd think.
The divorce rate in our country is tragic. One out of two marriages end in divorce. That's 50%! It would probably be higher if the married couples that I meet everywhere I go, did what they say they wanted to do. Constantly, men and women confess to me how unhappy and unsatisfied their marriages have become, but because of children, finances or the fear of being alone, they stay. I'm not advocating that married people who aren't happy should leave their marriages! But, it does seem that there are fewer and fewer happily married couples than unhappy ones. This is not how it should be! I'm convinced that one of the reasons is our lack of patience in waiting for the one whom God specifically designed for each of us. Sometimes He'll show us clearly that we are with the wrong person, but we refuse to listen. We marry them anyway and then blame Him for our mistake.
We are a people who long to be with others. We were designed that way. We all want to feel loved and accepted. There's nothing wrong with that. But, we can't look to another person to make us feel complete. If our identity is wrapped around who we're with or in someone else's opinion of us and not in who God says we are, we're going to be a very dissatisfied people. If we don't start to understand this, we'll continue making bad choices in our lives and I'm not just talking about who we spend our time or life with. This bears repeating, our identity must be found in who God says we are and not in another person. It's not fair to expect someone else to make us feel content, happy or good about who we are. That's way too much pressure to put on anyone.
My sister has an incredible marriage. She met her husband in college and they dated for several years before going down the altar. They are two of the lucky ones. They didn't just marry eachother's best friend, but there is no doubt in my mind that God created Bob just for Brenda and vice versa. They fit like two pieces in a puzzle. I envy them. If you knew them, you would too. They've been together for over 16 years now and are more in love with one another than when they first met. Brenda told me recently that she would still rather spend her time with Bob than any other person. I am so proud of them. They make me hopeful about the future.
Yes, I still believe in "happily ever after". Not like the fairy tales, I'm not that naive. But I know in my heart that marriage can and should look the way God designed it. And I think that's worth waiting for. I've learned a lot about myself these past two years. Some lessons have been harder than others, but it's been a time of healing and growing. And, no, I'm not done yet. I may not be where I need to be, but I'm far from where I used to be. I call that progress.
I'm very excited about this new life of mine and what God has planned for me. Whether I'm single the rest of my life or I ever meet "the one", I am content with knowing that I'm never really alone.
And that's ok with me.
The divorce rate in our country is tragic. One out of two marriages end in divorce. That's 50%! It would probably be higher if the married couples that I meet everywhere I go, did what they say they wanted to do. Constantly, men and women confess to me how unhappy and unsatisfied their marriages have become, but because of children, finances or the fear of being alone, they stay. I'm not advocating that married people who aren't happy should leave their marriages! But, it does seem that there are fewer and fewer happily married couples than unhappy ones. This is not how it should be! I'm convinced that one of the reasons is our lack of patience in waiting for the one whom God specifically designed for each of us. Sometimes He'll show us clearly that we are with the wrong person, but we refuse to listen. We marry them anyway and then blame Him for our mistake.
We are a people who long to be with others. We were designed that way. We all want to feel loved and accepted. There's nothing wrong with that. But, we can't look to another person to make us feel complete. If our identity is wrapped around who we're with or in someone else's opinion of us and not in who God says we are, we're going to be a very dissatisfied people. If we don't start to understand this, we'll continue making bad choices in our lives and I'm not just talking about who we spend our time or life with. This bears repeating, our identity must be found in who God says we are and not in another person. It's not fair to expect someone else to make us feel content, happy or good about who we are. That's way too much pressure to put on anyone.
My sister has an incredible marriage. She met her husband in college and they dated for several years before going down the altar. They are two of the lucky ones. They didn't just marry eachother's best friend, but there is no doubt in my mind that God created Bob just for Brenda and vice versa. They fit like two pieces in a puzzle. I envy them. If you knew them, you would too. They've been together for over 16 years now and are more in love with one another than when they first met. Brenda told me recently that she would still rather spend her time with Bob than any other person. I am so proud of them. They make me hopeful about the future.
Yes, I still believe in "happily ever after". Not like the fairy tales, I'm not that naive. But I know in my heart that marriage can and should look the way God designed it. And I think that's worth waiting for. I've learned a lot about myself these past two years. Some lessons have been harder than others, but it's been a time of healing and growing. And, no, I'm not done yet. I may not be where I need to be, but I'm far from where I used to be. I call that progress.
I'm very excited about this new life of mine and what God has planned for me. Whether I'm single the rest of my life or I ever meet "the one", I am content with knowing that I'm never really alone.
And that's ok with me.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Pump & Burn!
Well, I did it again. I attended yet another exercise class, hoping to restore my faith in instructors. Last night, I participated in the "Pump & Burn" class.
First of all, here's a bit of advice. Always keep in mind that in January and February, the gym is going to be packed so get to class early. Everyone is trying to keep their new year's resolutions so membership sales are at record highs. By the end of February, classes will be back to "normal" again. Empty.
There are those who try to stay on a regular workout schedule and those who think that just buying a gym membership will change the way they look and feel. That's like buying a set of weights, staring at them, while willing your body to a size 4. You actually have to pick them up people! Or how about those people who buy an exercise video, watch it from their couch while eating potato chips, then send it back for a full refund because they complain it didn't work!
Ok, so I'm at this class and it's packed. It was a challenge to find a spot for my matt, but I did. I found a little corner in the back of the room. I like my corner. And, don't ever try to take "baby" out of her corner! Noone bothers me in my corner. And noone can see me if (ok when) I mess up.
I was pleasantly surprised to find that the instructor and I knew eachother. (I've spoken to the women's group at her church.) Since she had spotted me, I now had to do well. The pressure was on.
The music began. It was good. Then warm ups. Also good. The class was a combination of weights, cardio, step and bands. It was great! I loved it. I felt like every part of my body got a workout. I kept up and looked like a pro! This was much different than my last experience. I left class promising to return again.
Then, this morning, I receive an e mail from the instructor. She said she saw me in class and was glad to see me. She mentioned my "corner" space and told me she wants me in the front of the class right next to her! She also said she'd been reading my blogs and the blog about the step class made her laugh out loud! I thought only my mom, sister and daughter's read my blogs! It's nice to know others are reading. But then.
Then, it hit me. I realized what she'd said. She had read the blog about the step class! Oh no! She could have thought I was writing about her! I was panicked! I had to make sure she knew!
So, this blog's for you Allison. I think you're an awesome, fun and wickedly talented instructor! Keep up the great work!
And, please don't take Vic out of the corner.
First of all, here's a bit of advice. Always keep in mind that in January and February, the gym is going to be packed so get to class early. Everyone is trying to keep their new year's resolutions so membership sales are at record highs. By the end of February, classes will be back to "normal" again. Empty.
There are those who try to stay on a regular workout schedule and those who think that just buying a gym membership will change the way they look and feel. That's like buying a set of weights, staring at them, while willing your body to a size 4. You actually have to pick them up people! Or how about those people who buy an exercise video, watch it from their couch while eating potato chips, then send it back for a full refund because they complain it didn't work!
Ok, so I'm at this class and it's packed. It was a challenge to find a spot for my matt, but I did. I found a little corner in the back of the room. I like my corner. And, don't ever try to take "baby" out of her corner! Noone bothers me in my corner. And noone can see me if (ok when) I mess up.
I was pleasantly surprised to find that the instructor and I knew eachother. (I've spoken to the women's group at her church.) Since she had spotted me, I now had to do well. The pressure was on.
The music began. It was good. Then warm ups. Also good. The class was a combination of weights, cardio, step and bands. It was great! I loved it. I felt like every part of my body got a workout. I kept up and looked like a pro! This was much different than my last experience. I left class promising to return again.
Then, this morning, I receive an e mail from the instructor. She said she saw me in class and was glad to see me. She mentioned my "corner" space and told me she wants me in the front of the class right next to her! She also said she'd been reading my blogs and the blog about the step class made her laugh out loud! I thought only my mom, sister and daughter's read my blogs! It's nice to know others are reading. But then.
Then, it hit me. I realized what she'd said. She had read the blog about the step class! Oh no! She could have thought I was writing about her! I was panicked! I had to make sure she knew!
So, this blog's for you Allison. I think you're an awesome, fun and wickedly talented instructor! Keep up the great work!
And, please don't take Vic out of the corner.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Oh, Bikki, is dat her name?
One of my most favorite people in the world is my Granny. Her given name is Esperanza. That means Hope in Spanish. My grandmother was born in Panama. She came to the United States after marrying the love of her life, an American man who was stationed there, 45+years ago.
My grandmother is not only the sweetest woman you'll ever meet, she's a walking comedy show. I refer hanging out with her to a Cheech and Chong episode (without the drugs!). She's a riot. I will share many stories in the coming months about my Granny and here's the first one.
Because of my speaking schedule, I travel quite a bit. With two daughter's still at home, I have to juggle sometimes to find places for them to stay when I have to go out of town. On top of that, we have a dog, a maltipoo named Gabby. One particular trip, as I pondered over whether to kennel her or not, I decided to ask my Granny if she'd like to keep her for me. She said yes. This would be the first time Granny had ever met Gabby. She was excited about taking care of her and looked forward to the company.
So, Gabby and I made the 30 minute drive over the river and through the woods to Granny's house! Gabby didn't know what to think, but caught on quickly that she would not be coming back home with me. I made sure I brought everything Gabby would need for her 4 day visit. I had brought a bag with her leash, food, treats and a chewy bone. I gave specific instructions for Granny on how to take care of her.
Granny listen intently to every word. She said, "Oh, Bikki, she be fine." I left confident knowing that my Gabby Girl was in great, safe hands!
Four days later, I made the trip back to Granny's house to pick Gabby up. She was at the door waiting for me. She couldn't stop jumping on me. I was happy to see her too. I kept saying, "Hi Gabby Girl, my Gabby Girl, I missed you too!"
My grandmother stood by and watched our sweet reunion and then out of the blue says, "Oh, Bikki, is dat her name?" (You must remember that my Granny is Panamanian so she speaks with a heavy spanish accent.) I said, "What, Granny?" She said, laughing hysterically, "Oh, Bikki, I forgot her name!" "Are you kidding me, Granny? What have you been calling her for the past four days?" I asked.
And my sweet little Granny looked at me and said as matter of fact as she could, "Well, Bikki, I just say, come here pouppy, come here pouppy and she comes".
God love her.
My grandmother is not only the sweetest woman you'll ever meet, she's a walking comedy show. I refer hanging out with her to a Cheech and Chong episode (without the drugs!). She's a riot. I will share many stories in the coming months about my Granny and here's the first one.
Because of my speaking schedule, I travel quite a bit. With two daughter's still at home, I have to juggle sometimes to find places for them to stay when I have to go out of town. On top of that, we have a dog, a maltipoo named Gabby. One particular trip, as I pondered over whether to kennel her or not, I decided to ask my Granny if she'd like to keep her for me. She said yes. This would be the first time Granny had ever met Gabby. She was excited about taking care of her and looked forward to the company.
So, Gabby and I made the 30 minute drive over the river and through the woods to Granny's house! Gabby didn't know what to think, but caught on quickly that she would not be coming back home with me. I made sure I brought everything Gabby would need for her 4 day visit. I had brought a bag with her leash, food, treats and a chewy bone. I gave specific instructions for Granny on how to take care of her.
Granny listen intently to every word. She said, "Oh, Bikki, she be fine." I left confident knowing that my Gabby Girl was in great, safe hands!
Four days later, I made the trip back to Granny's house to pick Gabby up. She was at the door waiting for me. She couldn't stop jumping on me. I was happy to see her too. I kept saying, "Hi Gabby Girl, my Gabby Girl, I missed you too!"
My grandmother stood by and watched our sweet reunion and then out of the blue says, "Oh, Bikki, is dat her name?" (You must remember that my Granny is Panamanian so she speaks with a heavy spanish accent.) I said, "What, Granny?" She said, laughing hysterically, "Oh, Bikki, I forgot her name!" "Are you kidding me, Granny? What have you been calling her for the past four days?" I asked.
And my sweet little Granny looked at me and said as matter of fact as she could, "Well, Bikki, I just say, come here pouppy, come here pouppy and she comes".
God love her.
Always a Queen to me!
Each one of my girls is unique. Although some of their characteristics are the same. If I were to compare, I would have to say that Teryn and Kendra are as alike as Tawni and Kolby are.
Kendra is the sophisticated, classy, cheerleader type. She's very involved in her school and liked by most of the student body. I am proud of the fact that she's not "clickish" and doesn't leave other's out that wouldn't necessarily be considered in the "popular" crowd.
That's why it came as no surprise to me when she was voted as Homecoming Attendant for the Sophomore Class. This is an honor because the student's actually do the voting. They choose three young ladies from each class and then vote on who will become the winner of Homecoming.
Kendra chose a beautiful, knee-length, red dress to wear and her hair and make-up were perfect. She didn't seem nervous at all when she was getting ready and had a great attitude whatever the outcome would be.
As I sat in the stands during halftime, awaiting the announcement of the winner, I was so proud of the fact that my daughter was among the finalists. She looked so beautiful and poised as she walked onto the field with her father and grandfather.
Then the announcement came. The winner of the Homecoming Attendant for the Sophomore Class of 2008 is ..........................Kendra K-----! Tawni, Kolby and I screamed out loud. I had my oldest daughter, Teryn, listening in on my cell phone when the announcement came so that we could all share the news together as a family. She screamed through the phone as loud as we did!
Kendra looked a little stunned, but was beaming. I am a blessed woman, to say the least. I am amazed that I get to be mommy to this beautiful, special young lady.
Yes, Kendra is special to her friends at school. They recognize the beauty she holds inside and out. She's got a great heart that's as beautiful as she is.
I sit back and watch the young women that are my daughter's and I'm so proud of the people they are becoming. And I admit, I enjoy taking just a little bit of the credit for how wonderful they are. But, just a little.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Score!
I just returned home from my Kolby Girl's basketball game! With 4 minutes left in the game, I looked up and who did I see kneeling down waiting to come into the game? No other than my baby girl, Kolby!! She was ready too! She's so adorable in her basketball uniform and those glasses, you just want to squeeze her!
From the minute she hit the court, my baby was all over it! Up and down and all around. She's not only the cutest basketball player you've ever seen, but she's good.
Within the first few seconds of play, she went for the hoop and was fouled. Now, she had two foul shots. There she stood (as I videotaped) at the line. Bouncing, bouncing, bouncing the ball. Bouncing it some more! And then, when she was ready, she threw the ball up and the shot went in! Not only did the crowd go crazy, Kolby jumped up and down so hard, her glasses flew off! The crowd went wild! They were shouting her name and even the referrees were excited for her! I was jumping up and down too so I'm just hoping I got the shot on film.
After making her shot, the confidence in Kolby was so evident by the way she played the rest of the game. She stole the ball, went for two more shots and assisted two lay ups. That's my girl!
After the game, Pastor Joe asked if he could borrow the videotape of Kolby's shot and her reaction. He said he wanted to use it for a sermon. He commented on how she had motivated the entire crowd because of her own excitement and how contagious it was.
I promised him that if it turned out, I would be more than happy to let him borrow it.
I am one proud mommy tonight. There are days when I pinch myself that I get to be the mother to Teryn, Tawni, Kendra and Kolby. Today was no exception.
You'll notice there's a pretty nice bruise on my arm. And this is one kind of pain I can live with any day of the week!
From the minute she hit the court, my baby was all over it! Up and down and all around. She's not only the cutest basketball player you've ever seen, but she's good.
Within the first few seconds of play, she went for the hoop and was fouled. Now, she had two foul shots. There she stood (as I videotaped) at the line. Bouncing, bouncing, bouncing the ball. Bouncing it some more! And then, when she was ready, she threw the ball up and the shot went in! Not only did the crowd go crazy, Kolby jumped up and down so hard, her glasses flew off! The crowd went wild! They were shouting her name and even the referrees were excited for her! I was jumping up and down too so I'm just hoping I got the shot on film.
After making her shot, the confidence in Kolby was so evident by the way she played the rest of the game. She stole the ball, went for two more shots and assisted two lay ups. That's my girl!
After the game, Pastor Joe asked if he could borrow the videotape of Kolby's shot and her reaction. He said he wanted to use it for a sermon. He commented on how she had motivated the entire crowd because of her own excitement and how contagious it was.
I promised him that if it turned out, I would be more than happy to let him borrow it.
I am one proud mommy tonight. There are days when I pinch myself that I get to be the mother to Teryn, Tawni, Kendra and Kolby. Today was no exception.
You'll notice there's a pretty nice bruise on my arm. And this is one kind of pain I can live with any day of the week!
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