Graduation Week

I can't believe it. It's surreal. It's unbelievable. My two youngest daughters, Kendra and Kolby are graduating this week. On the same day, this Thursday. Kolby from 8th grade at 1:00 pm and Kendra from high school at 7:00 pm.

I am so filled with emotion. When I start to think about the days I would sit in front of the television with Kendra, who as an 8 month old, had to watch Barney for 8 hours straight, I get very melancholy. She just LOVED that purple dinosaur. She owned everything Barney. Her sheets, blankets, pillow, pj's, toothbrush, hairbrush, hairbows, you name it, she owned it. Now, she's interested in Ed Hardy clothes, a laptop, moving out as soon as she can and college!

Then there's my Kolby Girl. The youngest of the four. The little girl with four mothers. Our baby. She'll be a freshman next year. A freshman! She continues to convince me everyday that she's as excited about Kendra moving out and going away to college as she is about beginning high school!

As my life continues to change, with daughters getting married, having children of their own, graduating middle school, graduating high school and preparing for college and all the other "changes" I'm experiencing, I'm reminded of one thing.

Time is but a fleeting moment and we need to savor every one.

Trudy

It was twenty four years ago. I was living in Charlotte, married to Teryn and Tawni's father, when I met her. Due to some family issues, my little sister Brenda, who was a teenager at the time was also living with us. I first saw her when I was working for a fitness center. She and her husband were visiting the tanning salon across from my place of work. I don't remember exactly, but I think they came over to check out our memberships and we struck up a conversation. From that day on, each day she came to the salon, we would talk. During one of our conversations, she mentioned she needed a sitter. I told her about Brenda. We came to find out that we lived in apartment complexes next to eachother. We exchanged numbers and before long, I was introducing her to my little sister, who became the regular babysitter to her son, Donnie.

Our friendship was instant. Trudy and I felt like we'd known eachother for years. We could talk about anything. Believe me, we did then and today, we still do. That was the beginning of our lifelong friendship. Trudy has been through all of the challenges's life has brought my way and I've been there for hers. The divorces, kid issues, deaths in the family, personal issues, my destructive habits, etc. etc. I swear this woman knows me better than anyone.

Three years ago, she called to let me know that her doctor needed to perform an emergency hysterectomy. That was how it started. That ugly word came not long after. Cancer. Chemotherapy came next. She handled it all with class. After chemotherapy treatments, she had to have full body scans every few months to make sure the cancer hadn't returned. Each evening before her scan, and the next morning during the ride into the hospital, we'd pray together. Like so many times she'd done for me, it was my turn to encourage and support her. And each time, the scans were clear and we would rejoice together and plan our next yearly weekend Chateau Elan trip. This is something we've done every year for 8 years. Away from husbands, kids, worries and it's our time. Noone's ever been invited on these trips. And we've made a pact that we will never take anyone else there, not even our husbands.

Three weeks ago, the call was quite different. The doctor's found something. There were spots on her lungs that needed to be biopsied. And a few days later, the results were in. The cancer was back and this time had metastized to her lungs. I was shocked. I got angry, I cried and then I got a grip.

This past Tuesday, Trudy started chemotherapy again. This time, it will be much more aggressive. She will have treatments for 9 hours a day, 3 days straight, with a three week break followed by another round. Then the waiting will begin. She will have another full body scan. The goal: to shrink the tumors so they can be removed surgically.

This cancer is called leiomyosarcoma. It's a rare, soft tissue cancer that attacks the soft tissue, i.e. lungs, liver, uterus. Only 10,000 people get it each year.

Trudy and I have long had a dream since we became friends. We've layed on our beds at Chateau Elan during our weekend trips and talked and imagined one day living as roommates when we're 80 to live out the last days of our lives together. (Sorry, George and Terry, but stats show that women outlive men, so this is why we started making these plans years ago!).

Trudy and I still have lots we want to do. When Trudy is well again, Chateau Elan, here we come!

And when we're 80, we'll take a 2 bedroom, 2 bath, please.