My Potty Break

Yesterday, I made the beautiful drive from Nashville to Chattanooga.  Not to visit the Chattanooga Choo Choo Hotel or the Acquarium, but to meet my daughters.   

Kolby, who's 16, had been visiting her father in NC and Kendra, 20, a student at UNC-Charlotte, was also coming home in preparation for our beach vacation next week.  We were to meet at 2, but since they were running an hour behind, I had to keep busy in downtown Chattanooga until they arrived.  I didn't mind.  We agreed to meet at the downtown Starbuck's, which is connected to the beautiful, historic hotel, now called the Sheraton.  I thought I'd enjoy a tall, white chocolate mocha, with raspberry, stirred, 3 pumps each, with whip cream (in other words, my diabetic coffee!), as I waited for them.

It was relaxing to sit and enjoy my coffee, while reading the local Chattanooga magazines.  I realized I needed a potty break, so I strolled into the Sheraton and found the proper accomodations. 
As I walked into the restroom, I noticed right away it was rather noisy.  There were two women with 3 young children in tow.  I'd guess the children ranged in age from 4, 2 and maybe 10 months old.  They smiled at me.  I smiled back.

As I came out of the stall and began washing my hands, out of the blue, one of the women proceeded to start slapping the older child who was washing his hands beside me.  I wasn't sure what he'd done, but all of a sudden, she went after him.  Over and over again, she slapped this poor, little boy on his back, his arms, his back again, then his head.  The whole time yelling at him, "I TOLD YOU not to do that!  YOU KNOW better! You are an idiot, a stupid *&$^%@#& idiot!"  It happened so fast.  I was stunned.  From around the corner, the 2 year old appeared and the woman continued her tirade on her.   I made eye contact with the children and glared at the woman.  The kids seemed helpless and humiliated, yet accustomed to this punishment.  I couldn't stand it any longer.

Now, I'm not one to keep my mouth shut in situations like this.  But for a few brief moments, I couldn't speak.  I was completely dumbfounded.   I noticed the older child didn't cry and the younger one let out a faint whimper.  The woman seemed to grow more agitated.  Maybe she wasn't receiving the "fix" she craved?  I, frankly, was growing more and more pissed off.

I finally spoke up,  "EXCUSE ME, but, don't you think that's a little bit extreme?! Seriously, are you friggin kidding me?!"  She said nothing.  I seriously wanted to take this woman and go ninja on her!

Right away, the other woman who was with her quickly exited the stall as she heard my question.   She looked at the other woman as if to say "let's get out of here!".  They grabbed the children, stared at me in an attempt to intimidate me, sneared and walked out.  My heart was racing.  Just what I needed, a brawl in the ladies room! 

Unfortunately, this isn't the first time I've seen situations like this and feel confident it won't be the last.  I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down.  After drying my hands off, I searched for them.  I don't know what I'd have done, if anything, if I'd found them, but they were gone. 

I will never understand how anyone can believe that practically beating a child and talking to them as if they don't matter, instills confidence or even positive behavioral changes.  How in the hell can anyone believe this kind of treatment is acceptable?  You may get your child to stop doing something, but what you're doing to their spirit isn't as easily remedied.

My youngest daughter is 16, so I don't have younger children at home anymore.  I know raising toddler's isn't easy.  I raised 4 of them, but I was not a parent who spanked.  Don't get me wrong, I believe in discipline, but I decided spanking would not be my discipline of choice.  I know I made the right decision for me.  My girls' are amazing people.   

Maybe you believe that it depends on the child?  So, what does that mean?  That some kids deserve to be slapped, beaten, humiliated and some don't?  That's crap.  I don't believe ANY child deserves it.  If you're a parent whose decided to spank as your discipline of choice, that's your God given right.  But, I hope you never hit your child in anger.  If you do, shame on you. 

God help us when these children grow up.  They're going to be some pretty angry adults.