Haiti Called

My daughter, Tawni, is in Haiti. She's at an orphanage with children who are hurt or sick. Although, I'm incredibly proud of her, I won't lie. As her mother, I don't want her there and I wish she wasn't there. Because, frankly, it scares the hell out of me. I watch the news. I've heard about what's happened to some people who've gone there to help the Haitians, only to be shot or arrested.

When I first heard about the earthquake, I had this sick feeling in my stomach that Tawni would be going. I don't know how to explain it, call it mother's intuition, but I just knew. I knew she'd want to use her new nursing degree to help others. For those of you who know her, I'm sure you're not surprised. Tawni has an amazing heart and would do anything to help anyone in need. When I heard the news that she was raising money for her expenses, I somehow knew the finances would come. From what I understand, the financial support came quickly. You can imagine how my heart sunk when I realized she was really doing this. I knew she was going to a place where people are starving for food and water and using desperate measures to get it, even if it means hurting or killing the people bringing it.

I was told that she was going with a whole group of people from a church and staying in the Dominican Republic. I was told that they would be driving each day to Haiti and then back to the Domincan Republic at night to sleep. Now, I find out that she was dropped off at this orphanage because that's where she was needed. Alone. There's no group! She tells me there are guards out front and that she feels safe. She tells me that only a few of the older orphans speak english. She tells me that the children are hurt, sick and some can't see because of the infection in their eyes. She tells me it's hot and she's very sweaty and the conditions are horrible. She's alone there for a week and she tells me not to worry! It's very hard being a mother. Sometimes, honest to God, I wonder if I was cut out for it.

At this point, I can pray. Pray to a God that I trust to protect and keep her safe from bad people, harm or illness. And in reality, she doesn't belong to me anyway. Don't get me wrong. I'm sorry for the people of Haiti and what they're going through. I'm proud that our country and others are helping them in their time of need. And, as I've said, I'm incredibly proud of my own daughter for wanting to use her nursing skills to help. Yes, I'm bursting with pride. But, she's my daughter. My Tawni Bear. And, I want her safe. Safe from criminals, desperate people, disease or harm. I don't want a martyred daughter.

I want a safe, happy and healthy one.